Friday Fictioneers: Creeping

I decided to do another Friday Fictioneers prompt this week.  So….here it is, something short from a normally long winded fiction writer.  I don’t think it turned out the greatest though.  It sounds more like an excerpt than a short.

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Copyright-Rich VosaI watch the door open slightly, a gentle tuff of air moving it from the other side.   The light snakes down the hall and stops at my feet but I move quickly so not to be discovered.   A shadow moves inside it, faltering it’s crisp invasion of the darkness.  Someone is there, the weight of their presence stealing each quickened breath that escapes my parted lips.

I feel safe in the shadows until the door is flung open, sending my back slamming into the wall.  No sound is emitted with the action, only the silent shout of light that has captured me.

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37 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers: Creeping

  1. This is very sinister, the idea of being pursued by light. Beautifully described. Sometimes the most innocuous of things can be turned into something frightening.

  2. Agreed it’s a scene or a part of something bigger. No biggie for me, I love scenes were I can add my own imagination.. And the “silent shout of light” could be used in a haiku…

  3. Nice work. Captured by the light. This is my favorite, “Someone is there, the weight of their presence stealing each quickened breath that escapes my parted lips.” You’ve captured the moment of what is happening with your writing.

  4. Well, done. I can see this as a scene as well. However, you’re the creator and you will find the appropriate place for this intense moment. Enjoyed the read.

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